Dushan helpfully contributed this preview of his own seminar, “The Mastery of Wisdom Behind the Bar”; Saturday, July 24; 1-2:30; Grand Ballroom North, The Royal Sonesta Hotel.

1. A real, grown up bartender is much more than a drink mixer. He is more than a server, as well. Ideally s/he is a union of 3 personalities. Integrate The Mixologist, The Sage and The Rock Star into a well oiled character that oozes confidence in every situation.
2. Master the practice of “relaxing into what is”. That will keep you at a safe distance from desiring the situation to be different then it is and it will keep your inner dialog about your preferred likes and dislikes at bay.  The greatest benefit of all is the maintenance of “energy” which results in a happy, positive attitude.
3. Remind yourself as often as possible that everything you perceive is filtered by your mind, which is a very complex thing.  The world you perceive is subjective and so is everyone else’s. An 8 ounce fillet mignon might look like a satisfying meal to you but someone else might see it as an example of cruelty to animals. Remain un-identified and free of associations and judgments as in reality you can only know yourself.
4. Experiment with your cocktails. Whether you jigger or free pour, try to see if the level of your awareness corresponds directly to the taste of your drinks. If it would be all about correct measurements and high quality ingredients – ten a machine would do a much better job at making cocktails then any human. And we won’t admit that now, will we? Be honest and open-minded. You’ll be surprised!
5. Be clean, be healthy, be always on time, be respectful of everyone, study, listen, have your code of ethics and follow it, lead by example and above all strive to develop humility. Some of the greatest bartenders were and are very humble in their service performance.
6. Remember – you never know who is sitting in front of you. Maybe the person 2 feet away is a liquor company executive looking for a new brand ambassador? Or maybe the couple that is so polite is looking for a partner in their new restaurant/bar?
7. As Dale DeGroff put it: “it used to be bartenders people went to see and not bars”. And that is exactly the idea. Become “All things to all people” – a well balanced professional.
8. Find a Teacher – judge him by his fruits! Do not for a moment believe that you already know it all just because you have grown a mustache, wear suspenders and have read Harry Johnson’s Bartender’s Manual. Look for a bartender that will teach you the whole enchilada. And when you find him, spend some time watching him work and check out his apprentices. If you like what you see ask him to take you on as an apprentice and do what he tells you.
9. Pass it on! You are now the last link of a long chain of bartenders who have been passing the knowledge from teacher to apprentice for countless years. Whether you are aware of it or not you are a part of a lineage. Do you want a future Wikipedia page to have your picture with the comment that says: “…and this is the shmuck with whom the lineage ends…”? As soon as you are comfortable with your insight, start teaching others. Only teaching will create more learning as an effect.
10. “My father, a landlord of distinction who ran three successful pubs in his lifetime, taught me that in order to be a good publican-which requires qualities very similar to those of a bartender-you must have “as many faces as the town hall clock.” He didn’t mean that you shouldn’t be true to yourself and speak your mind when need be. What he’s saying was that it’s often necessary to react to situations in such a way as to guide the outcome to a pleasant conclusion.” – Gary Regan, The Joy of Mixology

What’s Tales of the Cocktail like?  What’s it all about?  What do you do?  Until a week ago I couldn’t tell you the answer to any of those questions.  I was, to use the parlance of my time, a newb.  So I went, I saw, I learned and I loved every single minute of it.  Then, once my brain had returned to semi-normalcy,  I started thinking how I’d sum it up for someone who is in the shoes I so recently vacated.  My mind filled with a variety of analogies, but there was one that seemed to sum it up best.

Imagine the most amazing cocktail party you’ve ever attended.  Good food, great drinks, perfect location, awesome people, overall an amazing party.  Okay, now that you have that image in your mind replace that drink you’re holding with an unbelievable cocktail imagined and mixed by a world famous bartender.  Got it?  Good, stay with me.  Replace the food with world famous New Orleans cuisine.  All the people at the party?  They’ve been replaced by cocktail enthusiasts, bartenders, distillers and characters of all sorts.  Oh and a final note.  The party is in New Orleans and lasts 5 days.  Blown away yet?  You will be, just give the awesomeness of Tales time to soak in.

Certainly it’s not a perfect analogy, but that’s not surprising.  Tales is an event not easily put in to words.  That said I’d like to offer some bits of wisdom that I gained from Tales of the Cocktail 2009.

1)  Stop Thinking About Going and Do It – You absolutely won’t regret attending even for an instant but I can guarantee you’ll regret it if you don’t.  I debated going in 2008, didn’t and regretted it.  A year later there are no regrets, only awesome memories.

“[When I was a kid] you could order bourbon, beer or bourbon and beer.  We had three things.” – Tom Bulleit

2)  Tales People Are Amazing – Every single person I met from cocktail enthusiasts to cocktail celebrities were fun people and more importantly truly excited about being part of the Tales experience.  There is an amazing leveling effect at Tales.  It doesn’t matter where anyone comes from, what matters is that you’re there and you’re excited about cocktails.

“Contrary to popular belief alcohol is not supposed to burn your ass!” – Steve Olson

3)  You Can Drink For Free, but You Should Buy a Few Anyway – Sure, you can drink all day long and not pay a dime while at Tales.  But that misses a key part of the equation.  You’re in New Orleans, home of some of the country’s, if not the world’s, great bars and bartenders.  Explore, experience and enjoy.

“A good mixologist needs to know what things taste like.” – Paul Pacult

4)  Don’t Forget the Food – If you’re signed up for a full day of sessions time for mid-day food is a bit sparse.  But don’t worry, there is always breakfast and dinner to fill that void.  Again, you’re in New Orleans, home of amazing chefs and their restaurants.  From a humble po-boy to an elegant five course meal all the food was fantastic.

“Punch is the drag queen of the cocktail world.” – Dan Warner

5)  Plan Well – There is so much to attend at Tales it can be overwhelming to figure out your schedule.  Plan ahead for the sessions, tastings and events you really want to attend.  That way you’ll have an idea of what your days hold.  That’s not to say you can’t change you mind at the last minute, but at least you’ll go in with a plan.

“[John] Myers is pretty much the guy you don’t want to see after you hear the snap of a latex glove.” – Wayne Curtis

6) Drink Water – On the first day I was talking to Meade, a fellow Tales attendee, and he gave me some of the most sage advice I got.  Drink water and lots of it.  Every tasting room, session and event has bottled water.  As you walk in to any of the aforementioned grab a bottle and consume it.  You need the fluids.  If the constant cocktails and spirits aren’t enough to convince you consider the heat and humidity.

“We’re not drinking…we’re learning!” – Francesco Lafranconi

So there you have it.  I learned a ton and as you can well guess from Francesco quote drank quite a lot in doing so.  It was an incredible experience, and one that I certainly hope I’ll get to enjoy again.

“Ever heard of a ‘death bucket’?” asked Brooks Reitz, one of the fabulous Cocktail Apprentices here at Tales of the Cocktail.

Apparently, it’s the brainchild of Johnny Iuzzini and some of the other molecular mad scientists, who have found a way to extract the heat of habanero peppers, leaving behind the pesky skin, flesh, seeds, and flavor. Just a big bucketful of pure searing heat, aka the “death bucket.”

And Corey Bunnewith, another talented Apprentice, was brazen enough to sample from the bucket in the Tales production kitchen. “I just dipped the tip of my pinky in, and tasted that,” he confided, “and I was still hopping up and down, it was insanely hot!”

Yes, this is the kind of insanity going on behind the scenes here at Tales.

Last year, we had just a handful of crazy-spicy-hot cocktails; this year, they seem to be everywhere, some nice, some not so much. Mixologists are painting bold pictures with broad strokes. At last night’s cocktail competition, NOLA’s Ricky Gomez whipped up a drink called “The Pinch Hitter,” a Tabasco-spiked pina-colada-and-Scotch mixture, described as a drink that “will hit you in the nuts.” (Easy there, big fella, even spicy drinks are meant to be enjoyable).

Another big, bold, buzz-worthy drink was Alex Valez’s “Caesar Valez,” made with anchovy dust, “Parmesan air,” and garlic water. I wasn’t at the seminar where this one was made, so I can’t say for sure where it fits in on the spice or the deliciousness scale.

And wayyyy on the other end of the spectrum, at the Christmas in July seminar, one of my favorite drinks so far was served up by Chesterfield from Mount Gay rum – an ever-so-gently spiced “Southern Christmas Punch.” The Barbados-style egg nog was made with Mt. Gay Extra Old rum, cream of coconut, condensed milk, almond essence, and a good dose of cinnamon and fresh clove. Lovely, drinkable, and a far cry from the “death bucket” experience.

I have always been fascinated by the changes that a spirit undergoes as it ages in wood and the effects of time and temperature on our favorite spirits. So I was thrilled to be able attend a seminar on just that – Cask Strength 1:1.

The moderator was Francesco Lafranconi and the presenters were César Cestari from Cabana cachaça, Larry Kass from Heaven Hill and David Blackmore from Glenmorangie. Too much information was given to repeat it all here (much as I would like to!), so here is a summary of some interesting highlights.

César Cestari – Cachaça

Cesari briefly went through the production method for regular Cabana, which is aged less than a year in neutral Jequitibá rosa wood barrels of various sizes. While cachaça is not commonly thought of as aged in America, there are many aged examples in Brazil and César brought us two examples of his own to taste. One was aged less than 2 years in Jequitibá rosa barrels and one in American oak. The first had ‘an elegant cedar-wood’ quality while the second started to taste a bit like a whiskey. I don’t believe that they are bottled yet.

Since he doesn’t want to cut down live trees, Cesari has been slowly sourcing used Brazilian woods to make barrels from. He plans to continue his experiments with different woods and barrel sizes.

The very high humidity in Cabana’s riverside aging house reduced the amount lost to evaporation. Lafranconi added that in the Caribbean, barrel losses can be as much as 8-10% (I assume per year).

Larry Kass – Bourbon

We then watched a slick video on the current state of largely automated barrel making for the US bourbon industry. It was quite a contrast to the British Isles where most of those jobs are still done by hand.

Kass then covered some basics on Heaven Hill and the legal definitions of straight whiskey, but for this seminar, the main point was that the aging prescription is constrained by law to new charred white oak barrels for a minimum of 2 years. Of the eight major bourbon producers, all use a #3 char, while Wild Turkey is alone in using the #4 char (heaviest).

This doesn’t seem to leave all that many variables, so he talked about the rickhouse structure that is common to the US industry. These are 7 story uninsulated buildings with a thin metal skin and a number of windows  that Heaven Hill opens in April and closes in November. He told us that it stays cool throughout the hot summer on the first floor, but gets up to about 110-114°F on the top floor! This dramatically affects aging and evaporation rates floor by floor. For example, the 27 year old Parker Heritage Collection whiskeys were taken from the lower floors and are not overaged, but on the upper floors that point can be reached in 19-20 years.

David Blackmore – Scotch

Scotch whisky makers rarely use brand-new barrels, preferring to use barrels that have already held something else and had the edge taken off of their initial aggressive activity. In fact, Glenmorangie have their own barrels made in America from Ozarks oak they have rights to, but lease them to Jack Daniels to have American whiskey aged in them for 4-6 years before shipping them to Scotland to be filled with their own products. Since they also air-dry the staves for 2 years (as opposed to faster kiln drying), that means that it takes 7 years to get a barrel ready to be filled! It wasn’t clear if this process was for all of their whisky, or just the ‘designer cask’ specification used for their Astar product that was brought for our tasting. We got to taste some Glenmorangie new-make spirit (white dog), some Astar that was aged in new charred barrels and the release Astar aged in the post-Jack barrels. The new barrel example was interesting but really much more aggressive like a bourbon, while the one from used barrels tasted like a premium single malt.

Barrel aging is really a fascinating topic (to some of us, anyway), and one that holds such complexity and yields its secrets so slowly that no one can really claim to have mastered it all. Thankfully, these spirits can be fully enjoyed even without understanding all that goes into making them!

W New Orleans Hotel paired up a perfect blend of spirits courtesy of the Contemporary Cocktail crew and the culinary creations of Chef Roberto Bustillo, Jr. who has won the NOWFE (New Orleans Wine & Food Experience) Gold Fleur de Lis in 2006 & 2007 and a Silver Fleur de Lis in 2008. Zoë’s contemporary setting set the stage for a sold out crowd with the usual Tales buzzing—both conversation and intoxication. What a night!!!

The evening kicked into high gear with a grapefruit cocktail titled 212…then a zinger from Chef, a Hawaiian Red Tasmanian Sweet Crab draped with a chilled spiced Gazpacho. The cocktail crew whipped up a refreshing Don Julio Blanco with Fino and St. Germain Elderflower to balance the sassy tomato.

Louisiana in the summertime!! Remember the days of injecting vodka into watermelons? Our next meal brought back memories of drinking melon cocktails drenched in watermelon juice in front of the family’s camp. Our very attentive servers brought in our next pairing. The Del Maguey San Luis, sweet vermouth, watermelon juice and Averna with corn crusted scallop dusted in corn meal served over pickled watermelon and candied chow-chow.

Then the exquisite lobster and artichoke lasagna roll served with shaved black summer truffle and porcini mushroom foam. By this time, things were really getting high pitched—both in the provocative storytelling and the moaning & groaning with every presentation. You could feel and see the energy—sipping turned into gulping with the wicked combo of Partida Reposado, Amontillado Sherry, Apricot Liqueur, simply syrup and bitter.

Next on the menu…roasted sea bass (my all time favorite) dashed with sweet corn and fava bean relish accompanied with El Tesoro Blanco, Viogner, apple & lime juice and honey syrup. And for dessert, fresh ginger lemon Verbena sorbet crowned with our last cocktail, Milagro Barrel Sellect Anejo and Sazerac with Absinthe Ginger Rinse and Lemon Verbena Foam.

A smashing evening had by all and although our Contemporary Cocktail pals are jetting back to homebase the creative juices keep flowing with the Zoë Lounge mixologist extraordinaire Amanda Buhr. Join Amanda and savvy cocktailing hipsters for their 4:59 cocktail hour with $4, $5 and $9 specials. Or just let Amanda take control. She has that N’awlins magic spinning her spells, tickling the throat with mind blowing combos. Mojito fans will never drink another after Amanda’s strawberry mojito made with muddled fresh strawberries, mint and Jeremiah Sweet Tea Vodka. Just sit down and enjoy the ride!!
Cheers…
Deb

Meaghan Dorman is a freelance writer and bartender at NYC’s Raines Law Room.  She also blogs about spirits & cocktails at www.SpiritMeAway.com.

We all know bartenders can be fresh. Their witty, often-politically-incorrect banter is half the fun of enjoying cocktails out on the town. But this year at Tales, bartenders are encouraged to literally get fresh- as in juice and ingredients. On Tuesday afternoon, Dale DeGroff and Tony Abou-Ganim showed bartenders, managers and owners how to make their cocktail program all about fresh and natural ingredients. It takes planning and dedication, but trading in chemical-laden mixes for real fruits and vegetables will make a huge difference in the taste and esteem of your cocktails. It can also improve a bar’s bottom-line, which Dale showed us happened in the case of the Marriott Marquis when they priced out fresh fruit for juice versus bottled mixes.

Along with the establishments that Dale and Tony have worked with, there are a few bars across the country that have been working with fresh ingredients for years, and slowly spreading the word. I talked to two expert bartenders, from opposite sides of the country, about the  increasing trend of fresh juice programs.

Michael McIlroy, of NYC’s Milk & Honey, has noticed a big change since he came to New York four years ago, saying “It has come on leaps and bounds! It’s great to see that bartenders now know that a squeeze of fresh lime or lemon juice can make all the difference to a drink, whether its used in a cocktail or as simple as a fresh cut garnish for your gin & tonic. I think that now more owner/ operators get that their customers expect an element of ‘freshness’ in their drinks.” And while he takes a pride in knowing many follow M&H’s example he said “Bars such as Death & Co, Little Branch, Raines Law Room & Clover Club also fly the flag too. Plus don’t forget, we got our start thanks to Angel’s Share even before I knew what a Manhattan was!”

H. Joseph Ehrmann, of San Francisco’s Elixir, says San Francisco is a leader when it comes to fresh ingredients, though many places still scared to make the commitment. “I am seeing a big change in bars that are not necessarily doing “fancy cocktails”, many of them eschewing the term “mixology”, to simple fresh juices. This is tremendous to me. Even the most geeked out of mixologists that I know like to go to a dive for a shot and a beer. And if they see fresh citrus and a hand juicer, it’s good to know you can get a real Collins, a Screwdriver with real orange juice or a Caipirinha with real lime. All it takes is for a bar manager who hasn’t really had a fresh margarita to do it once, realize how easy it is, and the change is made.” H also hopes that bars embracing fresh ingredients will then step up to all-organic produce, saying “The organic move is one I firmly believe in. The fact that organic products have more stringent  production requirements that lead to higher quality products. You can upcharge for that. People pay it, happily.”

So for those that haven’t yet, its time to take Dale and Tony’s seminar title to heart- Stop Talking and GO FRESH!

Steve Mirsky helps people explore different cultures and learn what makes their food unique at www.gastrotraveling.com.  He invites readers to  consider him as a free go-to source for better understanding anything potable or edible in their backyards or across the globe.

Our heightened eco-consciousness is shaping everything from the cars we drive to the cloths we wear.  So it’s only logical that transitioning from gas guzzling SUVs to hybrid cars and from high priced designer clothes to vintage and hemp based threads would extend to what we drink.  And I’m not talking about locally sourced fruit juices or recyclable water bottles.  A healthy variety of liquors showcased at Tales of the Cocktail will be certified organic.  Look out for the following:

Rain Organics Vodka

Rain Red Grape Hibiscus

Rain Organics is hand-made from scratch, exclusively at Buffalo Trace Distillery, three-time winner of Malt Advocate Magazine’s “Distillery of the Year” award.  Crafting their small batches requires a 20 day production process which includes using cold water, white organic corn, sweet mash fermentation, and seven distinct distillations.  In the final polishing stage, they add pure limestone water for a distinct smoothness and taste.  Resulting vodka flavors include cucumber lime, red grape hibiscus, and honey mango melon.

TOC Tasting Opportunity: Martinis & Massages – Fri., July 9th, 4-6:00 p.m., Hotel Monteleone’s Royal Ballroom C.

LOFT Organic Liqueurs

A ton of earth friendliness is packed into LOFT liqueurs.  According to co-founders Lisa Averbuch and Sabrina Moreno-Dolan, their entire line is made from the freshest, as-local-as-possible organic fruits and botanicals available.  Absolutely no synthesized flavors or bright neon colors here!

LOFT Liqueurs

You can’t get closer to nature than signature flavors like lavender, spicy ginger, and lemongrass.  You’ll notice that the lavender is clear, not purple, even after maceration but the flavor is unmistakable.  Another unique characteristic is that these liqueurs are mostly sweetened with agave nectar.  The whole package wouldn’t be complete without their tree-free paper labels made from bamboo fibers, biodegradable inks, and cardboard cases constructed from recycled materials.

TOC Tasting Opportunity: Cocktail Fresh Market – Wed., July 8TH, 10:30AM – 5:30PM, Hotel Monteleone’s Queen Anne Parlor

TRU Organic Gin and Vodka

Tru Vodkas

Husband-and-wife team Melkon Khosrovian and Litty Mathew began concocting Artisan gin and vodka as a hobby because they couldn’t stand the flavor of mainstream vodka.  Now they run Modern Spirits, offering a complete lineup of foodie-friendly flavors like Black Truffle, Celery Peppercorn and Candied Ginger.  Delicately balanced for food pairings and ideally suited for gourmet cocktails, they use 100% certified organic American wheat not only because it’s a gold standard ingredient but because it also reduces transportation pollution during production.  Artisan techniques include lemon vodka infused with hand-zested organic California lemons; vanilla vodka infused with hand-scraped organic Bourbon vanilla beans; and their 14-botanical gin made from whole-ingredient maceration similar to those made in the 16th century by European doctors.

Energy saving techniques include state-of-the-art column stills yielding purity in only one pass, filtering through activated charcoal, and utilizing vapor distilled water.  Beyond using 25% less glass than traditional bottles and recycled packing materials, they plant a tree in partnership with Maine-based Sustainable Harvest International for each and every bottle of TRU Vodka they sell.

TOC Tasting Opportunity: Cocktail Fresh Market – Wed., July 8TH, 10:30AM – 5:30PM, Hotel Monteleone’s Queen Anne Parlor

Jeffery Lindenmuth is a full-time writer who has covered wine, spirits and food for Men’s Health, Cooking Light, Food Arts, Women’s Health, Men’s Journal, Time Out New York, Esquire and many others. 2009 will mark his sixth pilgrimage to Tales of the Cocktail.

Whether you consider Tales of the Cocktail the Davos of drinking or the Disneyland, there is no denying this event has quickly emerged as the single most important destination for all things cocktail. I’ve watched “Tales” grow exponentially since its second year, and while a few Tales goers have my attendance record beat, I think I qualify as a veteran, so I’m here to lend a little advice for first-time Talers.

1. Practice Moderation
As I always advise, this is a marathon not a sprint. Your Tales memories will be that much greater if you have Tales memories. Kirsten Amann offers some great advice, and it can’t be overstated that there will be more delectable drinks to come tomorrow… and the next day. No matter how strong the temptation, be sure to make sleep and water a part of your daily regimen.

2. Book the Seminars you want NOW
For me, seminars remain the heart of Tales of the Cocktail. Having participated in the past, and reviewed many seminars for stories, the work and effort that many of these people put into their presentations is amazing. It’s not surprising, then, that many seminars are already sold-out.

My first year I attended four seminars daily, and while it was a great experience, it meant skipping lunch every day, making the three-martini lunch look like child’s play. For me, two to three seminars per day is a manageable number, and enough daily stimulation for even the most dedicated cocktail enthusiast. Often you’ll want to attend several seminars that occur at the same time, so the time to plan your seminars is not when you arrive, but now. The new ticketing system in place this year makes it easy to print your tickets before arrival.

3. Get to the Tasting Room
If you’ve been unable to book all your preferred seminars, or wisely allowed yourself some free time, there is always the tasting room. Here you’ll find many of the same incredibly knowledgeable people that conduct seminars, with a few added Tasting Room advantages. These events are casual. They don’t require reservations. They are free. I’ve just heard that a certain gin will be offering a tasting that takes attendees through the distilling process, from new-make spirit to final product. That sounds like a tasting I’d love to attend.

4. Do Something NOT Cocktail Related
Tales of the Cocktail could easily be conducted in the artificial lighting of a glitzy convention center, yet it continues to embrace the city of New Orleans as its stage. It’s a city that loves cocktails, and offers so much more. Whether you choose to spend a few hours at The National WWII Museum or take a swamp tour, it will be a welcome relief from the fray and may be one of the most memorable parts of your trip. Depending on which route you take from the airport, you may notice that sections of the city are still upturned from “The Storm.” While I have not done this past tour personally, the Gray Line Katrina Tour gets generally great reviews on Trip Advisor. If you want to venture out, but still crave more cocktails, The Museum of the American Cocktail , located in the Southern Food & Beverage Museum at the Riverwalk Marketplace offers a non-drinking experience that is thoroughly steeped in cocktail history.

5. Pack Appropriately
I don’t care if you are on a connecting flight through Hades, this is New Orleans in July — it’s hotter here. If you’ve ever done Bikram yoga at 3 a.m. while drinking a martini, you have a good sense of last year’s Bartender’s Breakfast event. While I’ll refrain from giving too much sartorial advice, linen and seersucker are always a good idea. At Tales 2008, hipster mixlogists appeared to officially declare the straw hat is the new bartender beard. (With so many talented female mixologists in attendance, this is an especially good thing.) Find a little piece of portable shade at Meyer The Hatter. It’s within walking distance of the French Quarter. (You packed comfortable shoes, right?)

6. Meet the Shakers
Back in 1990s New York, I’d lurk around Blue Ribbon at 4 a.m. hoping to catch a glimpse of Mario Batali hanging out at the bar. Had the technology existed, we might have posted a mobile photo to Eater, but we never dared to approach him. However, at Tales of the Cocktail, the people who have revived and shaped our drink culture are everywhere you turn. And, in my experience, they are the most humble, enthusiastic and gracious people you’ll ever meet. The Carousel Bar in The Hotel Monteleone remains the equivalent of the Grand Central Station clock, where strangers meet and evenings are launched. Want to seduce Dave Wondrich, cocktail historian and author of Imbibe!, to stroll to Tujague’s for a Sazerac? Just ask. Or, you may hear firsthand how a Jerry Thomas book and late restaurateur Joe Baum inspired Dale DeGroff, author of The Essential Cocktail, to launch an American drinks Renaissance. As DeGroff recently commented, “I’ll tell my Tales and sing my songs at the drop of a hat!”

With generous spirits like DeGroff in our midst, you can’t help but learn a great deal and thoroughly enjoy yourself at Tales of the Cocktail. It’s an opportunity that comes just once a year, so make the most of every minute.

We are still heartily of the opinion that decent libation supports as many million lives as it threatens; donates pleasure and sparkle to more lives than it shadows; inspires more brilliance in the world of art, music, letters, and common ordinary intelligent conversation, than it dims – Charles H Baker Jr.

A jigger of history, a dash of entertainment and a garnish of grand showmanship set the tone for St John Frizell’s informative and, at times, gut-busting hilarious presentation on the life and times of the late, great cocktail documentarian, Charles H. Baker Jr.

Frizell was a terrific presenter and more than managed to keep the energy going at 10:30 AM on a Sunday morning to a packed room of mostly hungover “tired” cocktail conventioneers, surely no easy feat. With a gregarious and engaging speaking style, an aesthetically appealing slide presentation (including background music!) and treats for attendees such as a handout index of Baker’s complete cocktail recipes and raffle prizes, this was one of my favorite events at Tales this year.

Frizell was also generous enough to share his Keynote slides with me, and with his permission I’ve posted them below. Granted, gentle readers, as fair warning, both are but a pale comparison of seeing Frizell give this presentation in the flesh.

The Gentleman’s Companion: The Life and Times of Charles H. Baker, Jr.view presentation (tags: literature cocktail companion gentleman’s)

Mythic and a bit mysterious, larger than life and probably one of the most influential beverage writers of the modern age, Charles H. Baker, Jr. like no other before or since, both defined and documented the golden age of the cocktail. Bon Vivant doesn’t even begin to describe him. From mostly the 1930s onward, Baker scoured the globe in exotic locales from South America, through the Caribbean, to India and beyond, living a life of endless decadent banquets and cocktail parties, glamorous steamer voyages and other Orient Express like adventures. Hobnobbing with the celebrities of the day and minor royalty, Baker’s writings are more manuals on how to live the “good life”, than mere food and beverage guides. With advice on topics ranging from the practical to the esoteric, you can be certain that no matter what Baker is proliferating on it will be in a sort of prose that is both oddly metered and highly superfluous, at times bordering on the surreal:

TO ALLEVIATE APPARENT DEATH from Toxic Poisonings, & Especially Should, in any Happenstance, the Quality of the Liquor Be Suspect

…And in such case the symptoms are usually sudden and violent enough to publish the emergency. In any case where a violent illness is felt, or apparent, administer emetic at once. It is better to tax a patient-guest unnecessarily than to chance severe conclusion, and anyway, since the patient quickly regains a feeling of exhausted well-being no one will ever be the wiser.

Whew, pass the Gin. I need a drink after reading that one.

Or take this passage on hangovers a la Baker, as presented by Frizell,

…You awake to blazing light like a hot brazen sword at base of skull. Your scorched blanket-hot eyelids smart like salted live raw beef. In your querulous- queasy stomach lies a heap of tallow golf balls. Your tongue is a gun-wad of old burlap batting. Yestereve’s mixes have long since quit all benefit and have departed to greener pastures, leaving a residual aftertaste offering a fine blending of the overalls in Mrs. Murphy’s chowder and a well-aged Norse snow-shoe moccasin— if there be such a thing…

And so on and so on. Hemingway or Fitzgerald, Baker certainly is not, but he remains beloved anyway for his dogged pursuit of all things liquid and tasty. I for one certainly admire his prolific use of the thesaurus and typewriter, and find his writing style oddly enticing. It is an amusing brain tease certainly, trying to figure out what the hell Baker is talking about most of the time.

Alas, lucky for us, and buried between the mind-boggling passages like the above quoted, Baker did obsessively document his pursuits, tastes and recipes through his once long out of print, but still much coveted Gentleman’s Companion series books and through articles in places such as Gourmet, Esquire and Town and Country magazine.

Revered in hushed tones and considered a must read by serious cocktail aficionados, the influence of Baker continues to resonate. Baker certainly offers a compass and road map for those leading the way in today’s quality cocktail revival. Providing detailed and easy to follow recipes from the well known (including several versions for mint juleps); to the naughty (Angel’s Tit II, for example with its whipped cream mound and a cherry on top); to the exotic and unknown (such as the Yokohama Romance) these are no gimmicks. Instead, the thousand plus drinks in Baker’s universe are each small works of art, the antithesis of the detested “appletinis” and other sugary sweet garbage many a modern drinker falls prey to.

Therefore, who better than contemporary cocktail master St John Frizell of the Pegu Club and The Good Fork fame to keep the memory of Baker alive? For it is fair to say that Frizell is certainly a man on a mission when it comes to all things Bakeresque. In a sea of Baker fans, Frizell may very well be the biggest fan of all. He is certainly the most informed. Having given up his steady job as promotion copy director of Bon Appétit magazine in 2005, Frizell along with his wife Linden, retraced many of Baker’s journeys and tasted many of Baker’s drinks on a round-the-world adventure of their own. In addition, Frizell has an extensive article on Baker in the Summer 2008 issue of the highly regarded Oxford American. Well done, Mr. Frizell, well done indeed.

During the presentation, Frizell took his audience on a whirlwind tour of Baker’s life. From the unremarkable childhood in small town Florida, to the college years at Trinity in Hartford, Connecticut, to the “lost years” where Baker worked at the god-awful sounding Norton Abrasives company, nothing in his past would indicate the excitement to come. From there however, we were indulged with a sample of Baker’s early writings, his beginning travel itch working on an international cruise ship, and his later dabbles in pulp fiction. Through three marriages and several different residences around the U.S., Baker went from staid upper-middle class beginnings to a life of never ending sunsets and parties, fishing trips and world journeys while he wrote and drank his way through it all. In between sips of the refreshing Cuban Grapefruit Blossom cocktail offered to attendees, Frizell provided his take on Baker’s modus operandi and ability to live the life of a well-heeled international gentleman,

Baker’s three-fold path to success: 1. Inherit money, 2. Work on a cruise ship, 3. Marry rich.

I’ll toast to that, brother. Cheers!

Still, in a fast-food world where far too many distilleries and bars still pump out mass produced kool-aid flavored swill with nary a thought, and many drinkers would happily sip chilled radiator fluid without a care in the world, Baker is a beacon of light on the way the cocktail world could and should be. We salute this great man for his life’s work and thank St John Frizell immensely for bringing it back to us.

And so, before the turned page, we say: Salud y pesetas, skol, sante, salute, and here’s mud in your eye – Charles H. Baker Jr. The Gentleman’s Companion, Being An Exotic Drinking Book. Or, Around the World with Jigger, Beaker and Flask, 1939

_____________

Lizzy Caston is a food writer and hack journalist based in Portland, Oregon who writes for Portland Monthly Magazine, Edible Portland, Portland Spaces and anything else with Portland in the title, along with a whole slew of websites and national trade publications. She also owns the imaginatively named communications firm, Lizzy Caston Communications, with a specialty in marketing, interactive and new media. Although she has launched and manages websites and blogs for dozens of clients, she is adamant about never finishing her own: www.lizzycaston.com

At the Tales of the Cocktail Cocktail Party Thursday afternoon, there was no way to sample each and every cocktail offered at dozens of tables ringing a giant ballroom. For one thing, the party lasted only 90 minutes. Plus, the room was so packed with people it got hard to move after a while.

Marvin Allen, the renowned Hotel Monteleone mixologist, gave me a theme after I tasted his nicely balanced creation, The Irish Channel, which is named after a New Orleans Uptown neighborhood. After that, I went for drinks named after Southern locales.

The Irish Channel

• 2 ounces Old Bushmills
• 1/4 ounce Rhum Clement Creole Shrubb
• 6 drops Fee Brothers Orange Bitters

Coat chilled rocks glass with Creole shrubb. Pour Old Bushmills and bitters into cocktail shaker with ice. Shake until well chilled. Strain into shrubb-coated glass. Garnish with orange twist.

Lucy Buffet was serving this favorite recipe from her restaurant, LuLu’s, in Gulf Shores, Alabama. She is a cookbook author and, yes, sister of Jimmy Buffet. This cocktail is just as refreshing as its name. I loved it.

Bama Breeze

• 2 ounces Smirnoff Citrus
• 1 ounce Parrot Bay Coconut Rum
• 2 ounces fresh squeezed lime juice
• 3 ounces cranberry juice

Fill a tall glass with crushed ice. Add vodka and rum. Squeeze lime juice into glass. Fill with cranberry juice. Garnish with fresh lime wedge.

Brother Cleve created this cocktail, a delicious blend. And since Katrina, everybody in the world knows where this New Orleans neighborhood is. I hope some of the Tales visitors go there to tour it, a profound experience. [Editor's note: Brother Cleve was unfortunately unable to attend Tales this year; in his place, this drink was served by Misty Kalkofen]

The Ninth Ward

• 1 1/2 ounces Bulleit Bourbon
• 1/2 ounce St. Germain Elderflower Liqueur
• 3/4 ounce Fee Brothers Falernum syrup
• 3/4 ounce lime juice
• 2 dashes Peychaud’s bitters

Shake with cracked ice and strain into a 5-ounce martini glass.